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Ninja R:
The result of letting your kids grow up listening to loud rock music.

Name: Ninja R.

Age: Veritable curmudgeon

Home of Record: Winnie, Texas. Quit laughing.

Favorite Pastimes: reading, writing, coffee.

Likes: reading, writing, coffee.

Dislikes: hypocrites, liberals, war.

1. What are the credentials for being a ninja, and what qualifies you?

It should be duly noted that I have a black belt in Karate Champ, which is the first step to attaining ninja status...a far more worthy goal than a mere ‘Hoo.

2. The three greatest video games of all time and why?

Super Mario Brothers – one of the first NES games, it revolutionized the world of gaming.

Atari’s Adventure – because I just finally beat all three levels recently.

Final Fantasy – because it brings me back to the days of being 16 years old, stuck in a room listening to Metallica and Slayer day in and day out.

3. It is a well known fact that you dislike most organized sports. Why?

Because people are far too concerned with sports and not nearly concerned enough with things that actually matter. People like sports (in my humble opinion) because they are living vicariously through the lives of other men and women. I do the same things I’m interested in. If people applied the same amount of attention to important matters as they did to sports, this country would be in a hell of a lot better shape.

4. For the sake of science, you are being locked into a self-contained environment. While there, you are given all the food and everything you need for survival. You are only allowed to bring three personal belongings. What do you bring?

What a loaded question. How "original." I’d bring.....your mom, her dildo and an Internet connection. I’d plug into my brain and feed the world my propaganda MENTALLY.

5. When you became motivated to create a site, why did you recruit The 'Hoo, T2, Samurai B, and Reverend Dr. Jay Teachum to contribute at various levels? And also, are these guys legit writers or just a band of miscreants and misanthropes?

Well....I initially recruited The ‘Hoo because I thought he’d actually submit something. Hoodratz and its various endeavors are the brainchildren of me and The 'Hoo. Fellow conspirator T2...well, he’s the man on Photoshop and issues of the day. The rest were merely staff writers...such a band of miscreants and misanthropes can only be found within the dwellings of Hoodratz.

6. Have they even made any truly great movies in the last three years?

Hands down – Requiem For A Dream. Great movie.

7. In the history of rock what is more damaging, hair bands or the current crop of sell-out bands?

Sell outs, definitely. Sell outs merely perform because they’re required to...they’ve strayed from the path...and that’s traitorism. At least hair bands know they’re hair bands. Your mother knows this too....she wouldn’t be a groupie for ‘em if she didn’t.

8. Arnold won in California. Good for the country or sign of the apocalypse?

Any loss of a Democrat is a good sign for the country, Austrian born or not.

9. Are we going to get a hot secretary here at the Hoodratz office? We need eyecandy and I think everyone is tired of getting coffee.

I’d like to see Jennifer the Watson’s Girl apply for the position, although I doubt she’ll ever pay us the slighest bit of attention...*sigh*

10. One quick opinion or thought. Ready? Go!

Goddamn the liberals. They’re undermining the freedoms and foundations of our country. Decay from within. Fight the leftists with all you have, people. It's why I became a ninja. SLICE.

- Ninja R