Voting.
By T2, 08-24-04

Voting is the staple of choice. Without it, we'd be nothing more than infidels awaiting for someone like "Uncle Joe" Stalin to waste us for doing something like making a political joke. I know what you're thinking : "Quit STALIN and get to your point, T2!"

As many of you know, there's an election coming this November in which two bitter rivals are pitted against each other for the title of President of these United States.

I predict that Kerry goes down in the 4th. At least he's supposed to.

But why is it just two people? How did these two guys get so lucky that they were in the running for president? Bush has the obvious answer, he is simply running to get re-elected. How was he chosen in the first place? One guess could be the fact that they are both wealthier individuals, so the road to presidency was an easier one to go down. Of course this breeds hate amongst the repsective parties, as Democrats argue that Bush is from an oil wealthy background, and Republicans counter with facts of Kerry's immense ketchup wealth. I'm getting off topic here.

The question still stands, why doesn't anyone else run? Answer: They do. Nobody really cares though. For some reason, a lot of people in this country harbor the idea that once you are affiliated with a certain party, you should pledge your loyalty to them, no matter how retarded they can be.

A simple search for presidential candidates on google reveals that there are tons of other hopefuls in line to get a piece of the prez pie. On www.vote-smart.org, there's a list of well over 50 candidates, ranging from an 86 year old retired teacher to Mr. Muadin, an E-Democratic party candidate that bears a striking resemblance to a young Lenin.

Just a sampling of he candidates...click on them for a website.

Now, why aren't any of these people in the spotlight? I'm sure it's no simple answer, aside from laziness. Why bother going out and researching the candidates yourself when you can watch the negative ads the two big dogs throw at each other?

Why not take advantage of your right to vote? They always leave that little area to write in who you REALLY want to vote for. I know I'm going to. Rather than try and "spite" George W. like so many plan to do, why not write in someone who can do the job. No, not you…I'm talking about:

…does whatever a commander in chief can…

Think about it. The guy can stick to WALLS. And he has movies. I think that "Spider-Man 2" was this summer's best political movie. He saved a train full of people. Michael Moore would just want to interview them about how their fiery train death was not caused by a mad scientist with crazy metal arms, rather…the ties that the train had to the South American oil producers.

As cool as he is, he can't go at it alone. He needs help. Who better to run by his side but:

If the picture doesn't sum up his office potential, scroll up and look at it again.

What it boils down to is, vote something, and vote smart. If you like John Kerry, that's awesome. Make sure you like him for his ideals, not because his name isn't Bush. Find out who is going to make your life the best, and vote for them. If enough people do this, then life will get better, we'll have more of a say in what goes on in life, and everyone will finally stop worrying about things that happened 3294238 years ago and worry about what they'll do with your money for the next 4 years.

Of course, there's always my fantasy:

--T2

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